This week I HAD to share this amazing read with you. If you've been following along since the beginning of this year, you'll know that one of my resolutions was to read at least a book a month. This was my book for February since it was Valentine's Day and I must say it was a great choice.
The concepts in Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs will for sure be valuable in Phil and I's relationship. I've listed a few quotes direct from the book to help sum it up (because I'm terrible at explaining books haha):
“Wives are made to love, want to love, and expect love. Husbands are made to be respected, want respect, and expect respect”.
“When a husband feels disrespected, it is especially hard to love his wife. When a wife feels unloved, it is especially hard to respect her husband”.
“Often, we focus on our own needs and simply overlook the needs of the other person”.
“...without love from him, she reacts without respect; without respect from her, he reacts without love”. --That's the Crazy Cycle, you can turn this around to the Energizing Cycle if one of you is mature enough in the moment to take a step back and either respect or love the other. The Energizing Cycle is this: his love motivates her to respect him which then motivates him to love her and around and around.
“No matter how desperate or hopeless a marriage may seem, if husband and wife both have basic goodwill in their hearts, they can stop the Crazy Cycle.”
To recap: keep goodwill in your heart, she wants to be loved, he wants to be respected, take time to listen to one another and what each other's needs are.
I highly recommend you read this if you're in any relationship! Newly engaged, just married, or married for 20 years, this book will open your eyes to a new perspective on how to communicate and what your partner needs.
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